There are some books that come highly recommended and that you begin with great hope and, for some reason, it is not the book for you. This was my situation with Your Voice in My Head.
The book is a memoir about loss. In the book, Emma Forrest writes about two important people to her: her doctor, a man who helped her through bulimia, cutting, and suicide attempts, and her lover, a man she calls GH or Gypsy Husband. Both men left unexpectedly. Dr. R. did not tell his patients that he had cancer. He truly believed that he could recover. GH spoke of having a baby together and creating a family together and then one day flipped the switch and was no longer interested. Emma is left to her own resources.
I ultimately found both depictions of the relationships problematic. In the case of Dr. R, the meat of this story takes place after he has died. He cannot help her with the loss of GH. Forrest does write about their previous work together, but it feels less immediate, because the book is essentially about how she gets out of this current sadness. Forrest would often end chapters with testimonials from other patients about how Dr. R. saved their life. but these were one paragraph moments. They were big picture generalities. I liked the abstract notion of paying homage to this doctor who evidently was a great help to many people, but it didn't affect me deeply, because i felt like I was always skating on the periphery.
I also wanted deeper reflection on the relationship with GH. To me, after the relationship ended, there were too many instances of the narrator meeting someone and asking them if GH was sincere when he was with her. Their answer is always the same, "Yes, he really loved you. Then he changed his mind."
I wanted there to be a progression in the book, where Forrest would think more about the intersection between romance and reality. The highly charged nature of this romance to me seemed destined for a short fuse, unless there was some sort of a transition. She does not seem aware of the fact that they would have needed to have made a shift. She seems to mourn the loss of that phase without realizing that it naturally has a time stamp to it.
Many people love this book. It is being made into a movie.This is the type of book where the reader needs to descend into dark depths and then work the way out until she reaches that light at the end of the tunnel. In this one, I didn't buy the ticket. I watched from outside and chattered to myself.
NOTE: In rereading this piece, I thought that I have to mention that GH is widely assumed to be Colin Farrell. I didn't want to mention it, but it feels strange not to say anything about it as well.
